Waspythumping!
The idea for this came from Kil aka Michael Kilborn McCarthy
aka Wazzpin8or@aol.com, along with about half of the suggestions
for clips. I've changed things around a bit to make it fit better
with the actual length and correct lyrics of the song. If anyone
out there with the proper equipment and a lot of patience wants to carry this little
project out by creating the video described below, don't hesitate!
The song, of course, is "Tubthumping" by Chumbawumba. You might
not recognize the title but the lyrics are probably familiar.
[Waspy's head from "The Agenda" III drags itself by]
["Other Voices" I: Waspinator rises from the CR chamber, and cranks his
head around the right way]
["Dark Designs": Waspy gets slugged by a flying weight]
["Aftermath": Waspy climbs out of the CR tank]
["Coming of the Fuzors" II: Air Cheetor crashes into Waspy, sending him
spiralling to the ground]
["Other Voices": Rattrap gives Waspinator a robo-noogie.]
["Law of the Jungle": Waspy spins around in mid air while staring at
Terrorsaur's signal beacon]
["Possession": Super-speed Waspy flies rings around
the Maximals in their base]
["Dark Designs": Waspinator bounces off the walls; Waspy
spins in mad circles as he flies at the camera, drunkenly attacks
the Maximals, gets shot down, slams into the floor]
["Before the Storm": Blackarachnia kicks Waspy's head into Tarantulus's
lab. Must include his little "bbbbbht!" noise.]
["Coming of the Fuzors" II: Waspy gets torn apart
by the security force field]
["Coming of the Fuzors" II: Waspy parts get dropped down into
the compactor and smashed into a cube]
["Chain of Command": Waspy gets trashed by the Chain Gun o' Doom]
["Double Jeopardy": Waspy gets trashed AGAIN by the Chain Gun o' Doom]
["Coming of the Fuzors, Part 2": Waspy flies in front of
Silverbolt to take command]
["Spider's Game": Waspy's eyes pop as he realizes Airazor has
caught his missiles]
["Code of Hero": quick shot of Waspy's horrified face as Dinobot
crashes into him]
["Coming of the Fuzors" I: Cubified Waspinator "drag himSELF to CR
chamber..."]
["The Agenda" III: Waspinator gets knocked out of the sky by
Blackarachnia's skiff; Waspy parts come falling from the sky]
["Code of Hero": Dinobot stuffs Waspy in Rampage's gun barrel]
["The Trigger, Part 2": Waspinator and Terrorsaur are blasted out of
the sky by the obelisk ("Pterodactyl idiot!!!")]
["Bad Spark": Shot down by Primal, Waspy crashes head first
into the ground]
["The Trigger, Part 1": Waspy fires at Terrorsaur's missile which
hadn't exploded to set it off]
["Other Voices" I: Waspinator flies off, mumbling that "area
is... secure now..."]
["A Better Mousetrap": Waspinator buzzes in circles talking to
himself; as the camera pulls back, we...]
Back to Rob's Pile of Transformers
The Indian film industry meets Toys R Us.
A Duran Duran song becomes an homage to the "I love you let me give
you a hug" bug.
Not a parody, but an outline for a music video. Watch Waspinator get
trashed to the tune of "Tubthumping".
Dinobot sings the Stray Cats.
Tarantulus sings Men Without Hats.
A parody of a well-known Dire Straits song.
Okay, finally I've parodied something a bit more current. Enjoy!
Pegful of Fuzors
music by Cornershop
("Brimful of Asha")
There's Fuzors
Behind the stockroom shelves
Behind employees from hell
yeah they're no help
They're the ones that keep our hopes alive
Till they come out from the back room
and say that the shelves are dry
[Fuzor chorus:]
Peg full of Fuzors at the Toys R Us
Well there's a peg full of Fuzors at the Toys R Us
Peg full of Fuzors at the Toys R Us
Well there's a peg full of Fuzors at the Toys R Us
I've seen them
Taking up the shelf space and the ends of the aisles
We don't care about no HasKen warnings
'bout the promotion at the McDonalds
and the delays in shipping
[Fuzor chorus]
[Transmetal chorus:]
Everybody needs a Transmetal Megatron,
Everybody needs Transmetals
Everybody needs a Transmetal Megatron,
Everybody needs Transmetals
Mine's from the Toys R Us
Rattrap and Waspy, Toys R Us
Primal is ugly, Toys R Us
Die cast construction, Toys R Us
Ball sockets, Toys R Us
Rampage isn't out and neither is Op Op
The heavy boxes and the high price range
It's all at the toy store, Toys R Us
2 beasts in one, Toys R Us
Good guy Fuzors, Toys R Us
Predacon Fuzors, Toys R Us
[Fuzors chorus]
Seventy-seven thousand piece
Boxed G1 set
Everybody needs a Transmetal Megatron
Mine's from the Kay*Bee Toys
[Fuzor chorus]
[Transmetal chorus]
[fade out :]
The Retrax
music by Duran Duran
("The Reflex")
They've gone too far this time
Well I'll tell them why the bug is fine
I tell you somebody's freaking out
from his beast mode cause it looks like slime
He'll crush that foe when he hugs it
On gimpy legs he'll make his stand, ohhh-oh
Rec.mod is no place for the flaming
'Cause Retrax is not that bad, ohhh-oh
So why-y-y don't you buy it
Try-y-y-y not to knock it
Buy-y-y-y him don't mock it
The Retrax is a lonely toy, he's waiting in the store
The Retrax is in charge of keeping all of the pegs warm
And watching over toys that won't sell because they're bizarre
Every single time the Retrax sells
the shop brings out a dozen more
He's on the shelves and he wants to get off
But fans won't plonk down the cash, I've found
They'll sell the Retrax to Big Lots store
I want to be around when he's marked down
So why-y-y-y not buy Retrax
O-o-o-only ten plus tax
Gi-i-i-ives kids heart attacks
Ohhh the Retrax, what a bug, he must have two dozen moving parts
The Retrax is in charge of freaking children in the dark
And giving everyone a big hug, isn't that bizarre
Every single time that Retrax curls
looks an awful lot like Unicron
[Spoken intro:]
I thought that it really mattered
I thought that music mattered
We'll be singing, when we're winning
We'll be singing
I get knocked down, but I get up again
["Spider's Game": A mouse tugs at Waspy's antennae as he sits
with his head stuck in the ground]
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
["Possession": Megatron slams Waspy's head back onto his body]
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
Pissing the night away/pissing the night away
He drinks a whiskey drink/he drinks a vodka drink
He drinks a lager drink/he drinks a cider drink
He sings the songs that remind him of the good times
He sings the songs that remind him of the better times
"Oh Danny boy, Danny boy
Danny boy..."
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
Pissing the night away
["Maximal, No More": Waspy raises his hands in victory while
standing over the fallen Dinobot and Silverbolt. ("Waspinator
rulezzzzz!!"]
Pissing the night away
He drinks a whiskey drink/he drinks a vodka drink
["Before the Storm": Waspy's face falls as he realizes he's
holding a big bomb]
He drinks a lager drink/he drinks a cider drink
He sings the songs that remind him of the good times
["The Low Road": Waspinator falls out of the tree and bounces
away in the final scene of the episode]
He sings the songs that remind him of the better times
"Don't cry for me
Next door neighbour..."
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
[over the chorus]
We'll be singing, when we're winning
["The Agenda" I: Waspy fires at the Maximal autoguns, effieciently
taking several of them out]
We'll be singing
I get knocked down, but I get up again
No you're never gonna keep me down
[fade out]
Here's one for all you early 80s music fanatics. "Stray Cat Strut"
was one of the Stray Cats' more obscure hits (along with "Sexy + 17",
their other song that deserves airplay and doesn't get it.) But hopefully
SOMEONE out there knows it and will actually find this
funny...
Stray Raptor Strut
[THE SCENE: a dimly lit, mostly-empty Cybertron bar, with a small stage
tucked into one end. Through a window, a broken neon sign reads "Sweet
Little Hole-in-the-Wall". Optimus Primal (R) is behind the bar pouring
energon drinks. Waspinator is passed out on a bar stool, surrounded by
empty energon cubes and buzzing in his sleep. The rest of the Predacons
sit in the back of the room, amid a pile of energon cubes, broken chairs,
and various debris that indicates there's been a brawl recently.]
[The Stray Max, a back-up band composed of Cheetor (R) on lead guitar,
Rhinox (R) on bass and Rattrap (R) on drums, walk on stage amid sparse
applause. They start their set with a bluesy early 80s rockabilly hit]
[Dinobot (B) walks on stage, a large pair of dark glasses perched on his
snout. He shakes his head in disgust at his surroundings, then goes up
to the mike. He sings]
Pink and brown raptor taking on the Preds
Ain't got enough juice to bust their heads
I'm out gunned but I don't care
I fire eyebeams and blow them out of the the air
Stray raptor, yeah I'm fightin' mad
I'm a reptile Maximal, hey! Yeah that's sad
Yeah, clone thrown at me by the mean old Preds
If the rat don't shut up I'll bite off his head
[Dinobot struts around the stage, then snaps his jaws at Rattrap]
GrrrROWR!
Yes, do not cross me, vermin!
[Cheetor, also in shades, launches into a solo]
I do not bother chasing MICE around
I stalk through the forest
Looking for a fight
Huntin' Tigatron on a hot jungle night
Stealing the disks while Megatron cries
"Wow, Dinobot you're a treacherous guy"
I used to be on his side for a while
But I got kicked out
for my warrior's style
[Cheetor indulges in another long solo, till Rhinox clamps
down on his strings with a look: knock it off!]
I do not bother chasing VERMIN around
I stalk round the planet
Looking for a fight
Trashing anyone who mentions that I changed sides
Ruling the world while the Maximals fly
Till Cheetor says 'hey we can't leave Dinobot behind'
This Maximal sentiment's driving me wild
Cause I got Pred honor
And I got Pred style.
GRRRAAWWR!!
[as the song winds down, Dinobot snarls at the camera. His jaws close
down over it on the final guitar note and we fade to black. :]
--
Robert Powers, formerly of the Ever-Changing .sig
repowers@mailexcite.com
Still vowing to get my .sig back...
Gak. Here's another one. Less obscure this time. The original is Men
Without Hats, "Safety Dance".
[The scene: the same bar as before. This time it's full of teeny-bopping
protoforms. A cheesey band is playing early 1980s pop hits. Tarantulus sings
lead, directing most of the words at Blacharachnia, who is being forced to
play keyboards, obviously against her will.]
[Tarantulus]
We can scheme if we want to, we can program pods we find
Cause the Preds don't know and if they don't show
Then I'll make another of our kind
We can go where we want to,
A stasis pod they'll never find
And we can act out ways to get off of this world
And leave the Beast Wars far behind
And we can scheme
[Blacharachnia]
Or not...
[Tarantulus]
We can go where we want to
Megs is smart but so am I
And we can shoot real neat from machine gun feet
And surprise 'em with an island that flies
We can leave if we want to
If we don't Megs will make me ill
And you can act real cold and icily removed
And tell Scorp that he's an imbecile
I say,
We can walk, we can drive, everyone's a Transmetal
We can plot, we can scheme, every time a pod should fall
We can run, we can hide, but everybody knows of my lab
We can dine, we can feast, everybody's freaked by my laugh
Spiders' dance... x3
We can scheme if we want to, though Megs'll end your life and mine
As long as you are livin', never gonna forget
that I've a psychic link into your mind
We can scheme if we want to, we can leave the Preds behind
Cause the Preds don't scheme and if they don't scheme
Then they're no allies of mine
Say,
The aliens, they have come, everything's out of control
This planet, is surely doomed, they're wrecking it from pole to pole
We can plot, we can scheme, we both got claws for hands
We can plan, we can rule, everybody takin' the chance
Spiders' dance... x12
[As the song ends amid the audience's boos and jeers, Blacharachnia hoses the
keyboards with machine gun fire and stalks off stage, while Tarantulus just
laughs maniacally... :]
I Want My A. T. T.
music from "Money for Nothing" by Dire Straits
lyrics by Robert Powers ;)
additional lyrics by Burt Ward (Beavis@cris.com)
A glimpse at life here on our little newsgroup...
I want my...
I want my A.T.T.
[repeat four times]
Now look at them Transfans
That's the way they do it
They play a TF on 2K5 MUSH
Aw, that ain't normal
But that's the way we do it
Trade our money for robots,
get Beast Wars from Mc D's
Now that ain't normal,
But that's the way we do it
lemme tell ya, Transfans are nuts
Some'd trade a Blaster for their little finger
Some'd trade Grand Maximus for their Mum
We got to post those .gifs and .wav files
Custom tech-spec re-writery
We got to buy the UK comics
We gotta watch the cartoons on TV
The little Transfan with the BumbleJumper on card
Yeah buddy, he's got Fort Max
The little Transfan got his own Arcee kit
The little TransFan got a Unicron
We got to post those .gifs and .wav files
Custom tech-spec re-writery
We got to buy the UK comics
We gotta watch the cartoons on TV
I shoulda learned to play with 'em less hard
I shoulda kept Fort Max in box
Look at those auctions, they got
Jetfire for two hundred, man
he ain't even got his gun
Now who's postin' here?
What's that? The whole uncut movie?
We're flamin' each other like spammers
Oh that ain't fandom
Here's the way you do it
Postin' huge fanfics
and toy I.D.s
We gotta sing high praises of Furman
Gotta cut down Bob Budinsky
We got to get a complete Monstructor
Gotta get a Japanese Nightbeat
(spoken)
Now look at them Go-bots
That's the way they do it
You lay the blame on the company
Oh that ain't Sideswipe
But that's what they call it
Reissue Prime for nothin',
and miscolor Frenzy
(background vocals, spoken)
Dreadwing for nothing
if you go to KayBee
No female TFs
'cept that chick Arcee
Reviews of Beast Wars
by everyone but me
Alt toys transformers
or maybe a. t. t.
(backup vocals, sung)
I want my
I want my
I want my a. t. t.
That aiiiiiiiiiiin't normal!
(guitar solo - fade)